Review-Goats Eat Cans by Steven Novak

Goats Eat Cans Volume 1

Remember the weird kid with the greasy hair and the odd smell you went to school with? You know, the one who never talked to anyone? That creepy little jerk who sat alone at lunch? The oddball who never took a shower in gym class? The one you imagined might one day go on a shooting spree?

Believe it or not, that kid grew up.

He grew up, he got married, he never shot a single person, he wrote a book, and he even started taking showers after his workouts – most of the time.

Goats Eat Cans is his story.

Follow along as Steven Novak recounts the sometimes hilarious, sometimes hilariously painful, and sometimes painfully hilarious moments that have made his life so wonderfully frustrating. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you might even vomit. No matter what, you won’t be able to stop reading.

Goats Eat Cans features 55 stories, 55 illustrations, 99 luftballons and enough nonsense to keep you chuckling and giggling for days on end – or hours – or at the very least a few minutes.

My Thoughts:

 *WARNING* This book contains adult situations, sex, foul language, immature boys, poop, pee, semen, ungodly smells, evil cats, vasectomies, packing meat, hair bracelets, mean girls, trenchcoats, Kmart, online dating, adult bookstores, creepy twins, old men with high pants, whale watching, bathroom accidents, gay sex and petting zoos .

That said, this book was hilarious. Novak sifts through his memories, from about age five to adulthood, and highlights only the funniest, most humiliating, or stories that toe that line of too much information. You go back and forth between giggling hysterically and cringing in disgust.

I really enjoyed this book. You could tell that while Novak did not enjoy much of his childhood and high school days, it shaped him into who he is today; a quirky artist with a clever and hilarious sense of humor. Even through the most horrendous of stories about brown pants his snarky and sarcastic comments will have you chuckling in spite of yourself. I vacillated between feeling sorry for him for being tortured in high school, to pitying his wife for marrying him and having to put up with his shenanigans, to wanting to meet him in real life so I could see if he was as funny as he is in his book.

Novak’s voice is an interesting mixture of Christopher Moore, Chuck Palahniuk in Choke, and an irreverent one that’s all his own. If you enjoy that kind of thing, and I did, I’d suggest you pick up his book here and prepare for the insanity.


Follow Steven’s tour for a chance to win a signed Chapter Art Illustration, and a signed paperback of Goats Eat Cans. Two lucky winners will be drawn randomly at the end of the tour – follow Steven’s tour HERE

Don’t forget to leave a comment here today for a chance to win prizes at the end of his tour.

Cait Lavender, Cowgirl Writer

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  1. Steven Novak says:

    Many thanks for the review, Cait! You’re the first, only, and very likely last person to ever compare my writing to Chuck Palahniuk.

    Honestly, I probably have a lot more in common with Chuck’s car salesman brother, WIllie.

    I’ll take it though. ;)

    • I hope you took it as the compliment I intended! You also remind me of Chuck Wendis. Ever heard of him?

      • Steven Novak says:

        I have troubles taking compliments. I take putdowns exceptionally well though. They just feel so much more comfortable.

        Never heard of Wendis. I’m thinking that you might mean Chuck Wendig though – which would be another compliment of which I am totally undeserving. ;)

  2. Lisa Cox says:

    This sounds hilarious! I want to read this book. I’m putting it on my to read list and will buy it when I get the chance. If keeping goats is anything like keeping chickens, I know the stories are hilarious and disgusting, LOL.

    • Steven Novak says:

      Hopefully you enjoy it, Lisa! Unfortunately there is no mention of keeping goats, or chickens, or farm animals of any sort in the book.

      There’s still a lot of disgusting though.

      A whole lot.

  3. Anne says:

    Interesting review, kind of half “Oh, no” and half “Oh, yes”. Sounds like an excellent book to get one’s nasty younger brother, but maybe not cause it would give him even more bad ideas.

    • Steven Novak says:

      Oh yeah, you don’t want to get this for younger brothers. No, no, no. Not recommended. Not unless you want them to pour a gallon of urine on your head while you sleep.

      I’m guessing you don’t want that though.

  4. Susan Wigden says:

    I could not agree more with Cait’s review. Novak’s Goats eat Cans is hilarious and heart-warming and utterly amusing. Having said that, I highly recommend this read to anyone who can handle his insanity and sentimental take on life’s absurdities. Who would ever think someone would actually dare to say these things, and still come out our hero? Here’s to the creative genius of Steven Novak!

  5. Susan Baxter says:

    This book definitely sounds absolutely hilarious and is now on my to buy list on payday. As a side note,my son and his girlfriend work part-time @ a goat farm and there is a pr. of goat poop covered sneakers parked by my front steps @ this very moment,lol!

  6. Maegan Morin says:

    So I was sold on the book before you said Christopher Moore and now I HAVE to read it!! I love sarcasm and this book just sounds great!

  7. Lesli says:

    The title of this book is great. :D

  8. Marti Parks says:

    I definitely have to read this book.

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